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I suppose the diagnosis has offered some context and insight into why I have endured decades of loneliness, passive aggression, and emotional coldness that has left me depressed and bitter.
For financial reasons, divorce isn't an option at the moment.
In fact I guess we had already gone through a nightmare of 20 years before having any idea . It's like I have no right to know anything that's happening. I have often felt like leaving but I love my husband so much and we have a young child together who I don't want to take away from her family home.
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To those involved-- all of you NT's -- my deepest empathy. There is no 'doing things together ' I listen to him when he's ' banging ' on about things . His moods are terrible, coming home from work creates and anxiety I cannot describe as am I going home to Jekyll or Hyde.
Had I understood what I was getting into at the beginning, I would have run for my life much earlier. I've read alot of the testimonials and realise how old some of us are . I say ' I'm not disagreeing with you ' but still he goes on and on as if I was. In a lot of ways he could be described as a nice guy . If I get a hug its because he has suddenly remembered that that's what NT s want . I want to stay in our home with our kids and have asked him to leave and he refuses saying we leave in a box. I am an (inordinately patient and accommodating) step mother of an undiagnosed 12 year old with ASD.